I haven’t been on in a bit, I guess I have been trying to figure out some things in life and wasn’t exactly sure what I was going to write. I have been putting my focus on raising my little rugrat but haven’t really talked about the stress it can put on a marriage.
I always sit here and wonder, am I the only one going through this? Is there something that can be done to change it? Or are things to far gone?
A little back story, my husband I met 3 years ago. I had already been married once before to a man that was my “high school sweetheart” of 8 years, and so we were dating, I had the thought of whats the point in waiting forever since I had tried that last time and it ended it divorce. So about 6 months after being together, we got engaged and two months later we were married. Shortly after that, almost 2 months we found out I was pregnant. We were as happy as can be, we never had any issues and our relationship was great. While I was pregnant, 28 weeks to be exact, my husband left to join the Navy. He came back when my son was 7 months old.
It was stressful, and maybe that put too much stress on our relationship because I might as well be living with a roommate. When he came back, he was clueless and not the best help with our son. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I understand he was gone and it was all so new that it would take time to warm up and figure things out. Well he turned a year and my husband still struggled which was putting a lot of stress on our relationship. My husband would come home from work and head to the computer, nap or just play on his phone.
He did not make much of an effort to be apart of our sons life, then would get frustrated because my son did not really want much to do with him but only me. I figured that this was normal, but he is now a year and a half and my husband still prefers to sleep than be with our son. It’s frustrating, because my husband is losing out on so much from his own actions.
Because of him acting as though we are more of a burden, like we are in the way, it has put so much stress on the two of us. We talk about it over and over, the things that are happening in our relationship to how we change things but then it just goes right back to the way it was. We go and do things quite often, like a family trip each weekend but it’s as though the love is burning out. I’ll be honest, we don’t have any dates night but we did try a few months ago to go on one every two weeks. It was just awkward and we sat there in silence.
I worry, because I want this to work but am so frustrated at the same time. Is this common to happen in relationships? Will it get back to a normal loving state like it was before? Or is this just the end?